I wrote the below $.02 Saturday/Sunday Morning…..
I should be sleeping – I really should. But here I am after drinking a bottle of wine – and I’m awake at 1:18 am. Doesn’t make sense. Wine should have made me fall sleep. But oh no….not now. I have too much outside energy running around inside of me.
What does that mean? Well I can feel Bill being very connected. So is Will and Vincent. CJ is still hanging about – taking more of an interest in me than he ever thought he would or that he thought he was comfortable with, You know it’s difficult to dream about someone most of your life and then all of a sudden have them wind up on your radar. That’s what happened where Bill is concerned with me – and that what happened where I’m concerned with CJ. Especially since most of the dreams he can remember me in we were just kids. It’s a bit disarming. And quite frankly you just want things to go back to the way they were – before your “new knowledge”.
There’s a part of me that’s tired of new knowledge. Why can’t something happen with the old knowledge before someone else shows up? I don’t get it. Any of you – do you get it? Cause I’m at a lost. Like this guy named Michael (not to be confused with Mike from before). He’s showed up in my “area” for years now – years. And for the most part I’ve been able to compartmentalize him. Keep him tucked away as a curiosity and that’s it. But now this guy has superseded my curiosity. I want to know why. What possible connection do we have? And why now? Serious. Don’t I have enough going on?
I asked Andrew. You know what he said? Vincent is too stuck in his life, Will is too scared, CJ is confused and Bill doesn’t have the balls — so we open up the connection with Michael. I have to ask – is he a chicken shit too? Or would he seek out to explore something that he doesn’t quite understand? Andrew says he’s an explorer. Always has been – ever since he was a kid. I don’t know why Andrew is showing me Michael with a toy sail boat in his hands – but he is. The said boat is has a red base. Andrew also tells me that Michael’s mother is something else – and he means that in a good way. She pushes, yet protects Michael. If she find something or someone that can be a positive part of Michael’s life – she’ll put two and two together – despite Michael protests. So I wonder then – what will happen when she comes upon my blog? When she puts me together with the dreams he’s had most of his life. Then what? Does she call me 1st to chat? Or does she just hand the information over to him and guide him? I swear I don’t know. I wish I did. But I don’t.
I then said “screw it” and went to bed. We’ll see if anything comes of this connection. I’m rather tired of the “one-way” feel I’ve had with the past group.
Michael has been kind enough to keep hanging around. I keep getting the oddest flash visions with him:
Vision 1 – He and I shake hands. I can feel a zap of electric go through me – although I try not to react to it. The same happened to him – I think. We are then sitting at a table with two other women. Michael asks if the two ladies would leave us. They do. He leans across the table at me – and with a very stern look on his face he asks – why me? I open my mouth and start to say because of his past….he waves his hand to signal stop. Give me the real reason – he demands. I sit there and just look at him – trying to figure out what I’m going to say. I finally say – do you believe in soul groups? He smacked his hands together and said – I knew you felt the energy when we shook hands.
Vision 2 – He and I are on the beach. We are by some sort of rock formation. As the sun sets, the beams hit a crystal in the rock formation – which gives off another beam of light to a cave off the coast.
Vision 3 – Michael is inside a house looking outside. From his POV I can see me running to Vincent and jumping in his arms. Michael takes a sip of coffee and says – if he hurts her I’ll kill him with my bare hands. I hear a voice (sounds like Will) say – he’d no sooner hurt her than you or I would.
Vision 4 – He’s at my 25th High School reunion with me and we’re having a blast.
There’s more — but those are the ones I can remember off the top of my head.
My son told me tonight that guys are put on the Earth to drive girls crazy (I couldn’t agree more) and for guys to get big muscles so that they can be chick magnets. LOL. I tried not to laugh. I told him to remember that girls are nothing but trouble. He replied – oh mom, guys are trouble too. Snicker…oh how right he is….
Speaking of trouble – there’s a guy in Wooster who’s a psychologist who I find to be interesting. He and I have known each other since I moved to Wooster – he lives by me. You know how you know when someone is interested in you? Well he’s given me that sideways look for the last 8 years. When I could feel him looking at me – I would just keep looking straight ahead. He was married – I was married. Not about to go there or even give the appearance of going there. He was always polite when he saw me or my ex – never anything flirty or over the top. Well, then I got divorced. Still basically ignored him as I know his wife and I think she’s a great person – I didn’t want any signals to go anywhere that might be misread. So he tells me two weeks ago that he’s getting a divorce – been separated at that time for a month. Thought I would hear it through the neighborhood gossip line. Ha! I’m not looking the other way any more. But since our kids go to the same school – I do keep everything low key – flip him a hi when I see him and that’s about it. If we happen to be walking the same way in the morning – we’ll chat. We’ll see what happens – if anything. Well- something will happen, it’s just a matter of what and when. He does have the same kick ass divorce lawyer that I had…that guy in Orville is great! What I need to do is to find out when his birthday is — I pray he’s not a Sag or a Leo. Been there – did that.
Oh and guess what? His name is Mike. Yeah – seriously. No – that connection with what’s going on with Michael has not been lost on me.
I’m finally HOT in the Start Up Nation Contest! Whoo Hoo! I’m a smoking mamma!
On that note — it’s shower time:)