I’m trying not to cry – but I’m a big chicken worrier. My Black Lab – Brodie – has a lot of fluid in his lungs. He is going to the vet today at 2:15 EDT. Labs are famous for congestive heart failure and lung tumors. I am praying for bronchitis. Indy is also going to the vet today – 1:00 – for his annual thyroid test. He hasn’t been eating very much – and for a dog who lives for food – that worries me. So fingers crossed that my snoops are okay because if they’re not – then mamma here is not okay.
The kid goes in tomorrow for his neurology consult. I don’t think that anything is going wrong in his head – and I feel it is the energy he absorbs is the problem – but you never know.
Now would be a good time to have someone where to lean on. I’m not good at leaning – in fact – I suck at it. Blame it on me being the oldest child or that I help people for a living – I just bite at it. One of my lessons, I’m sure.
My son asked me if I was gay over the weekend. I told him no – not as far as I know – but why did he want to know? He said because I am not dating anyone and he thought it was maybe because I loved a girl. I told him no – that’s not why. Mom doesn’t have the time to date and even if I did – the pool in Wooster Ohio is but a puddle for me to find a date in. He replied that he’s tired of just one adult here – he wants another person with us. My reply – when I have time – and have some men to choose from (that are actually interested) I will consider dating.
So then he said – what about Will? I said – what about Will? Why hasn’t he called – he said? I don’t know – I replied – maybe he’s scared of us? We’re not monsters – the kid chimed in – we can love him. I know honey – I replied – this is something that time will have to take care of. He was not happy with that. The thing with the kid is he’s just as psychic as I am – and seeing the future or knowing what is supposed to happen, doesn’t help. It’s very frustrating to me – so I can only assume how frustrating it is to him.
On that note – both Tracey and I had major headaches last Thursday — this could only mean one thing, a visit from the guys. They did — and she emailed me this the next morning:
First, I remember Will coming to me and saying that he would not like to attend the meeting because he was feeling so great from his healing that he did not want Bill to ruin it with any anger towards him. He said that he is having a hard time being in Bill’s ‘field of energy’ because he’s so angry. He said – further – Ted is just as intolerable as he is in need of ‘cleaning up his act’. He told me that he had been saying prayers for Ted that he would get to rehab because he is concerned that if he does not he will have seriously ill health.
Then I remember Bill coming to me. He was all in white. He had this oversized white blouse on with puff sleeves and white pants similar to the type that men in India wear but different. He had on a necklace and it was made of ivory and there was a shark’s tooth on the necklace. There was light all around him. He told me that he had been cleansed and purified in ‘the lodge’. He further told me Allie did the ceremony. So, he said, tell Will I am no longer angry with him – I only have brotherly love for him.
Then I remember Ted coming in – oddly he had on Harley Davidson type clothes – all black, leather – not his typical garb. I remember in the dream feeling I had to ask him – so I did! I said, Ted what is with the clothes? He said – well since I am the villain in this situation I decided to fit the part. I am evil – don’t you know? Drinking and drugs – sex and rock and roll – all that stuff! Piss on Will! He thinks he is better than me! He said that he was living his life the way he wanted to and that no one including, Will would tell him how he should live his life! He said that Will was a judgmental prick. He lite a cigarette and pulled a flask out of this bag he was carrying. I remember looking in the bag and it was full of all kinds of alcohol and drugs, etc. I told Ted that he did not have to ‘play’ this role and that he could fill his bag with treasures instead. I filled it with healing stones and crystals. Then he illuminated and his clothes turned to an aqua greenish blue color and he looked much different. He said that he no longer needed those old things and that he was unhappy. He told me he needed healing too and asked if I would work on him and I said yes.
Then I remember the three of them coming together. Rather than talking about you at this point – they were talking about themselves. Will apologized to Bill and to Ted for seeming difficult and judging – and for not moving forward. He talked to them about needing to deal with issues and emotions and he told them he felt that he was a different person. He was thinking so much more clearly now. He could see the good in both of them and within himself. He thanked them for not giving up on him and for being his soul brother and friend.
Bill apologized and he shared that his love for everyone was what made him so passionate about bringing everyone today. He told Ted that coming together is important and that Ted would experience a transformation once the group was together. He told Will that he had an impt. part in all of this. He told him that his actions would change many lives. He told him that he was proud of him – that he loved him and that he did not want to bicker with him anymore. He looked to Ted and he said we are brothers and we are friends. We are on the same team. We are one.
Bill and Will embraced Ted. Ted was holding their necks tightly. Then this Gold Light surrounded all of them. There were these two triangle grids that formed into one shape. I hope this makes sense. The three of them were in the center of this grid. There was this sphere of light that appeared between them – in the center. It was golden white. It brightened. Then it ignited into a bluish flame. Then it turned into a gold flame. The energy was expanding all around them and it was spinning, pulsating, and I remember that I could feel the heat and the intensity of the fire. Just above them I saw an image of your face – like you were there but far away – it was so faint but it was there. Behind you I saw a blue Angel. She was faint or faded looking as well. The two of you sort of blended together into the background outside of the pyramid(s) grid.That is all I remember……but it seemed as though there was more or that these were really long or took a long time…………I woke up feeling like I had not slept.
Before she sent me that email – I had asked her to ask Bill about George. Now George is someone who has been around for awhile – and keeps trying to make himself better known to me – but I keep pushing his energy away. There’s a definite soulful connection as when I even think about George, my heart chakra expands. He’s 6 years older than me, from the Midwest (is KY the Midwest?). dark hair and dark eyes – and his b-day is only a few days different than mine. I don’t know about this one – what role he’s played and will play. I’ve mediated on him – asked Iris for input – and all I’m told is that if I know ahead of time it will freak me out and I’ll change the course. So hell – I don’t know. I can see where knowing more would freak me out – but I want to know more. I feel about George how I felt about Bill when I first discovered our connection – the “You’ve got to be kidding me” phase. But I don’t know our connection yet. So maybe I’ll hit the “Holy Shit” phase when that happens….
And yes, George is his real name.
So Tracey said she would concentrate on George and Bill as she fell asleep. This is what she wrote the next morning:
I had another dream this morning but I have no idea what happened. I saw a flash of what seemed like another planet. There were aliens. They were communicating telepathically but I could ‘hear’ th
eir thoughts…….. and I saw this purple, amethyst – violet – hues of purple looking dome thing and I was in a space ship and so were you and Bill – although I did not see either of you — I just ‘knew’ you were there. I woke up saying – B??????????? A??????? That is all I remember. But I had set that intention of G and B when I fell asleep – so maybe this is part of the answer?
So the plot thickens – even though I don’t want it to thicken, I want something to happen so that we can move forward. SIGH.
And on that note – time to start to get ready to take Indy to the vet.